We are in a weird part of summer break. I am loving the lazy, do not need to be anywhere days, but I am also longing for a routine again. Since we sold Jeremy's car the kids and I are basically home every day and I think the kids are in need of the routine of school and being with their friends. I had a cool opportunity happen today. My old principal contacted me and offered me a part time job back at the school. It was with a great deal of reluctance that I turned down the position. The hours would not interfere with the kid's school hours, but the time frame and the distance from our house would basically have me gone all day. I was super honored that he thought of me and offered me the position, and I have to say that it was not easy to turn down. Just trusting God that being 100% for my family is still the plan. Most days I am loving staying home and getting all the things done around the house and having every thing done when the kid's get done from school, but some days I just want to be with other people (shocker I know). I want to get dressed up and have someplace to go. Some days I feel guilty that God has given me a gift for teaching and working with kids and I am not using it. I did join the Sunday school team at our church and will start teaching the 3-5 year old class every few weeks, so I think that will help me use my talent and help me feel useful. I know that raising my kids the best I can is notable and the most important "job" I will ever do, but man, stay at home mommas need some love and encouragement. The days get lonely and for me the over thinking control freak days by myself can be unhealthy.
On the note of over thinking control freak :), I took about 5 days off from getting on FB. I did post a few pictures via Instagram, but did not get on FB to post those pictures.I did take a quick peek the other day because I was told there was a super cute picture of my nephew and I had to look. I took the app off of my phone to avoid the temptation. There were several reasons why I took the most needed break. I posted last Fall about the endless articles and websites that highlighted all of the bad things that were going to happen or could happen. A few weeks ago there were some things that started to circulate again that sent my anxiety through the roof. I was a mess for several days. I talked things out with my sister and my husband and they both helped me embrace what I already knew, what is getting so worked up about it going to do to stop whatever happens. I need to take the focus off of the bad/evil things in this world and focus on God who knows all and controls all. I started turning my energy of worrying into praying and asking God to protect and to change hearts. A week or so later our pastor preached on Exodus 33. This was right after the children of Israel had made the golden calf and had turned their backs on God and God told Moses that they would go to the land of milk of honey, but God would not be going with them. So Moses pitches a tent outside the camp and basically begs God to not leave the people. Moses remembers the wonder and goodness of God and Moses longs to know Him even more. You can listen to the sermon
here, because it is so good. Listening to this sermon, I could not help but think about the condition of our own country and I was convicted about my lack of pleading and asking God to restore of land and our faith. I had to take a closer look at my own life and the habits that I have formed when it comes to praying for those who have turned from God or have decided that the Word of God has changed or my own attitude toward the things going on in our country. That takes me back to my FB break. I was convicted a few months ago about the amount of time I spend checking FB. It was the first thing I looked at when I woke up and the last thing I scrolled through when I went to bed. For the most part my friends are uplifting and I want to know how to better pray for those in my life, but there is also a lot of garbage and a lot stuff that triggers emotions (fear, anger, jealously, ect.) that I don't need to be consumed with. I do not need to believe what everyone posts, I need to go back to what does Scripture say! I knew that my time on FB far outnumbered my time in the Word and that was not okay. I tried a few weeks ago to start reading my Bible app before I clicked on FB, but I knew it was something I was doing just to get it over with. So the last five days I have weaned myself off of checking my FB page every time I had a free moment. I took the time to open my Bible in the down moments. Instead of posting what I was doing or feeling I thanked God for those special moments or prayed about those feelings. I took these five days to lay down some guidelines that help me put what the Lord has to say far above what everyone else has to say. I encourage some of you to do the same and maybe keep me accountable as I try to live a life filled with His Word.
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| This has been a great reminder for me! |
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| We made some cookies today :) |
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