Tuesday, July 30, 2013
A few weeks ago I was browsing on FB and I noticed that a page I follow was advertising for a book that was now on sale for $5.00. The title of the book caught my attention because without even knowing what the book was about I knew just by the title that I needed to read it because I knew the feeling all too well. The name of the book is Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst. Unglued is the perfect way to describe how I feel sometimes and something that I need to work on. The real danger is that my undoing is 98% time taken out on the 4 people that mean the most to me.
I come unglued when my kids are fighting over the silliest thing in the car. I see the sadness in their face when I completely lose it and shout to them to "BE QUIET, NOW!!!! And I can feel the heat of rage on my face. Every time we go to Target my kids start fighting and I lean into Chloe's ear and with my teeth clinched warning her to get it together and I am fighting hard not to come unglued right there in the store. I come unglued when I walk into the bathroom and see pink nail polish on the toilet seat and the good bathroom towel that was used to try and get the pink nail polish off the toilet. I come unglued when the kids get up for the 5th time after they were told to go to bed. I come unglued when I have picked up the living room 800 times and walk back in and someone has pulled all the cushions and pillows off the couch for no apparent reason. Today at the laundry mat I told Samuel at least 10 times to stop throwing/spinning/shaking his bottle of Coke. I am loading clothes in the washer and I look up and he is literally dripping with Coke. The bottle exploded all over him! Once again, could feel the heat run over me and tried to keep from becoming unglued. I cannot understand why the moment my feet hit the floor my children have a list of demands that they need. How can my kids be hungry or thirsty all day? The phrase heard most this summer at our house is "mom, can I have a drink?" I read an article recently that described moms as the "Invisible Mom" and it is worth the read! I also need to work on how I respond to Jeremy. I know he asks me every day where something of his is at :) because I usually know where it is.
I guess as I read this I sound like a terrible parent, but as I have reached out to other moms and as I have read other articles I realize that this is a common problem. I think the danger comes when steps are not taken to help work through these feelings of emotions. I sometimes feel ashamed to discuss my struggles because I think that because of my situation and the difficulty it was for me to become a mom that I am not "supposed" to want to send my children off to boarding school some days :). I am starting to realize that these feelings of frustration only verify how I really am a parent!! :)
Well, I ordered the book and it came today. I read the first chapter and I just want to share a few lines that have already struck too close to home. I do not want my family to remember me with the wild, unglued look on my face :) I want them to remember me as kind and understanding even when they are not on their best behavior. I am looking forward to reading this book and see what I came gain from it.
"I know what it's like to praise God one minute and in the next minute yell and scream at my kids." pg. 13
"God gave me emotions so I could experience life, not destroy it." pg. 16
"There will be tender mercies for the raw emotions. No need to bend under the weight of past mistakes. That kind of bending breaks us." pg. 17
I come unglued when my kids are fighting over the silliest thing in the car. I see the sadness in their face when I completely lose it and shout to them to "BE QUIET, NOW!!!! And I can feel the heat of rage on my face. Every time we go to Target my kids start fighting and I lean into Chloe's ear and with my teeth clinched warning her to get it together and I am fighting hard not to come unglued right there in the store. I come unglued when I walk into the bathroom and see pink nail polish on the toilet seat and the good bathroom towel that was used to try and get the pink nail polish off the toilet. I come unglued when the kids get up for the 5th time after they were told to go to bed. I come unglued when I have picked up the living room 800 times and walk back in and someone has pulled all the cushions and pillows off the couch for no apparent reason. Today at the laundry mat I told Samuel at least 10 times to stop throwing/spinning/shaking his bottle of Coke. I am loading clothes in the washer and I look up and he is literally dripping with Coke. The bottle exploded all over him! Once again, could feel the heat run over me and tried to keep from becoming unglued. I cannot understand why the moment my feet hit the floor my children have a list of demands that they need. How can my kids be hungry or thirsty all day? The phrase heard most this summer at our house is "mom, can I have a drink?" I read an article recently that described moms as the "Invisible Mom" and it is worth the read! I also need to work on how I respond to Jeremy. I know he asks me every day where something of his is at :) because I usually know where it is.
I guess as I read this I sound like a terrible parent, but as I have reached out to other moms and as I have read other articles I realize that this is a common problem. I think the danger comes when steps are not taken to help work through these feelings of emotions. I sometimes feel ashamed to discuss my struggles because I think that because of my situation and the difficulty it was for me to become a mom that I am not "supposed" to want to send my children off to boarding school some days :). I am starting to realize that these feelings of frustration only verify how I really am a parent!! :)
Well, I ordered the book and it came today. I read the first chapter and I just want to share a few lines that have already struck too close to home. I do not want my family to remember me with the wild, unglued look on my face :) I want them to remember me as kind and understanding even when they are not on their best behavior. I am looking forward to reading this book and see what I came gain from it.
"I know what it's like to praise God one minute and in the next minute yell and scream at my kids." pg. 13
"God gave me emotions so I could experience life, not destroy it." pg. 16
"There will be tender mercies for the raw emotions. No need to bend under the weight of past mistakes. That kind of bending breaks us." pg. 17
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