Monday, January 26, 2015

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I haven't posted since last Monday. It has not been an easy week for me. Old struggles well up in me and I find my soul in a dark place. I don't like being in that place. We did not hear anything about the house last week and we are not even sure when we will hear something. I know it is just a house and I know there will be other houses if this one falls through, but this apartment has officially broken my spirit. Dramatic? Maybe, but I have reached my limit physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It was topped up on Saturday when I got a text from our landlord addressing something he had an issue with concerning something we were doing. Not really a big deal and he wasn't necessarily upset, but just the fact that he pointed out ONE thing that he wanted us to do different when I could of listed a dozen or more things that we have issues with just sent me over the edge. I am struggling and I really need to be in my own home. I have sucked it up the last two and a half years, but I cannot continue to pretend I can keep living here. We are going to plan to see a few more houses this coming week so we can be ready to act on another house if this one falls through.

The kids had a busy homework week and I am praying that this week will be easier for them. I had to take the girls to the dentist last Thursday and it looks like Emma will be visiting the orthodontist in the very near future. I have to call this week and get her an appointment. She really has messed up her teeth and mouth with her thumb sucking and she is going to need so much work done. She also has TWO extra teeth that will need to addressed by a oral surgeon.

We had a busy day on Saturday. Jeremy ran a half marathon in the morning. Emma had a birthday party to go to in the afternoon and Samuel was invited to a friend's house to play for a few hours. Thankfully I know both friend's parents and families so I felt comfortable leaving them for a few hours. I do feel bad for Chloe because she has not been invited to a friend's house yet. It is also difficult since she is also in 2nd grade and knows most of Emma's friends and she was not invited to the party. On the other hand, I am glad I do not have to make the decision about letting her go to a friend's house because I am not sure how she would behave with that kind of freedom. So, Chloe and I had a little date at Wal-Mart. I picked up Emma from her friend's house and then walked to get Samuel. Samuel and his friend were begging for Samuel to sleep over at the friend's house, but I am not quite ready for him to sleep over at a friend's house :).

Yesterday we had another wonderful church service and spent the rest of the day looking for houses online that we might want to go see and just resting.




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